Yo Mama 2

Thy mother, finding herself throughout
Life, primarily at sixes and sevens, was
often out of countenance with the many
clocks she horded, an accurate time for
which articles, she were all but fain to
establish.

Would that your mother were a toad, it is
my opinion that such an altered state
should convey unto her a dubious credit,
her being none the less foul, yet far
easier to dispense with.

That it should ever be of moment to
question what led your mother to
assume all the baser qualities of a
winsome trollop, I presume that my
testimony would be of tremendous
leverage, nor might it fail to address the
characteristics of physical appearance
that we have been said to hold in
common.

Though it may be quite obvious to the
regular cast of individuals who bear the
misfortune of transacting life within the
close precincts of your mother, that she
were ill-described for the function of
airline stewardess, her being of what
science has already taken great pains to
delineate as a gargantuan frame, it is
my confidence that air transit were not
completely impossible for her yet,
especially so, perhaps, if a tractor beam
could be made of use.

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